My Social Life

I realized something today.  The time I spend with teens at the Boys & Girls Club totally fulfills my social life.  Is that weird?  Maybe a little.  But here's the thing.  I come alive at the Club.  I get to be whoever I want to be-- ultimately ME-- and be accepted by everyone.  I've gotten to know a lot of teens over the past 2 1/2 years:  I have a good rapport with the rowdy boys who try to test me with inappropriate jokes or "almost" swearing-- they know I won't put up with their crap;  I get along well with the happy-go-lucky teens who don't necessarily need me but know that I'm there; I adore the teens who come into my office daily and stay there to talk and tell me about their day;  Currently I connect well with our 15+ homeless teens who have really crappy circumstances.  I talk to them like they're any other kid, reach out to them to show my compassion, and make sure I'm a positive adult in their lives;  I match my sassiness with the sassy girls who create drama and wear way too much perfume-- but I'm kind and don't hold it against them and still offer a smile and a friendly greeting;  I can be friends with the "popular" teens and talk to them about their busy lives and reflect on how intimidated I would've been 15 years ago;  I fit in with the cocky athletic kids who think they're the bomb and hold their heads high;  I even manage to befriend the annoying smelly teens who really drive me crazy, but who probably need me more than anyone else.  I'm surrounded by so many random personalities, backgrounds, and behaviors, and I'm blessed to have so many friends at the Club.

I do call them my friends.  I know there is a distinct line between "authority" and "friendship" and I respect and abide by that.  I also know it is possible to create meaningful relationships with many of these teens I see daily, and we become equally important in one another's lives.

So here is where my epiphany came from:
All the teens were buzzing about "free admission" night at Classic Skate for all the middle school students.  Not that I'd really want to go hang out at a skating rink with 7th-9th graders, but I could totally be content just hanging out with teens from the Club.  I enjoy their personalities.  They make me laugh hard every day.  We talk about real things.  And they make me feel like I'm actually cool, funny, and pretty.  :)

That's when it clicked-- these teens are my social life, as pathetic as that may be.  I have 4-5 hours every day to talk, laugh, and play with a variety of people in small or large groups.  I get to talk to whoever I want.  I get to wear whatever I want and still be accepted.  I get to bust out a random dance move walking through a door way and not feel stupid.  I get to teach and feel knowledgeable.  I get to share my own passions and have people listen.  Seriously, it's the best little social circle ever.

And that's why I'm totally content coming home on a Friday night with absolutely NO plans.  My "non-work" life mostly consists of spending time with my family or Cassity, my one and only roommate.  After such energetic and exhausting days at the Club... it's kind of nice to just come home and literally do nothing.  Or write a blog post.  Or just sit in my jammy pants and feel totally content.  If there's some dance going on down the street, I don't know about it.  If there's a hoppin' party at someone's house nearby... yeah, I didn't hear about it.  I'm kind of in my own little hermit-land, yet I love to be around people.  My social life has just kind of flip-flopped for the time being.

I'm grateful I have Cassity and appreciate the random adventures we go on.  I know it would probably be different if there were  2 or 3 others who lived with us.  We'd have people over more often and maybe even a few random boys would cross our paths every now and then.  But a 2 bedroom condo gives room enough for 2, and a little dog, and we have our happy quiet life.

Social butterflies by day... hermits by night.

So I thought to myself today:  Crap, I really am never going to get married.  Since I certainly won't be marrying anyone from the Boys & Girls Club.... my dating options are super limited.

I'm just kind of banking on those good 'ol set-ups that come through every now and then.

At the moment... my dating status is absolutely dead.

But I will say this:  I love my teens so much and really do have a blast with them.  Today a girl told me she wants me to be her counselor instead of the old lady counselor at her school.  (haha)  So we had a few fun "counseling" sessions here and there.  I helped another girl find her shoe that a hyper boy hid in the pool table;  I recruited girls for my "all girl" dodge ball team and called us the "Soul Surfers"-- we lost all our games and were the first ones eliminated from the tournament.  Oh well!  I gave out 10 otter pops and 5 McDonald's smoothies for recognition awards to awesome teens.  I threw chocolate milk cartons across the gym to kids who wanted a second one.  I accidentally missed and hit some little kid at a table.  I talked to a girl about why she's the bomb and why we've nominated her to be one of our "Youth of the Year" candidates.  I half-jokingly tried to put my fav teen's hair in a ponytail, all the while admitting that I'm terrible at doing hair and embarrassed for my own kids' hair one day.  I laughed with teens as they showed me funny videos on their cell phones they'd taken at the Club.  I ate a purple pancake teens created in the kitchen. I got to talk to a Mom and proudly announced that her daughter was chosen as our Youth of the Month.

That's just a sneak peak at what a normal day at the Club is like for me.  Social life fulfilled?  Yes.

I'll keep you posted on the whole getting married thing.