Cayenne Pepper & Other Terrible Things...

Anyone who knows me can tell you that I hate spices, herbs, and any "unnecessary flavoring", as I call it.  I never use pepper.  I only ever use salt to sprinkle across eggs.  I always ask for my fries at a restaurant to be unseasoned.  I brush off the salt on a salted pretzel.  Basically... I'm perfectly content eating food as it is and don't ever find use for any spices or other flavorings.  I'm a wimp when it comes to Mexican food and can barely handle mild salsa.  Most salsas at restaurants are too hot and I just eat the chips-- and brush off the salt if there's too much of it.  

So you can imagine my desperation when I tried the CAYENNE PEPPER gargle with water, simply to cure a sore throat!  You see it everywhere on the internet-- the miracle remedy that brings comfort within 1-2 hours.  I had been suffering for days and was willing to try ANYTHING on a miserable Saturday afternoon.  I coated my lips with chap-stick.  Then Vaseline.  (As they suggested on the website).  Then I added a teaspoon of ground cayenne pepper to a mug of hot water.  Then you just take a sip at a time, gargle, keep stirring, and continue the process until the mug is empty. 

It was absolutely disgusting.  After each gargling action, I was half spitting it out, half gagging, and half dry heaving over the sink.  My dog sat there watching me, looking totally concerned.  I continued the nasty  gargle, lips burning inside and out, and added a little more water towards the bottom of the mug because it was SOOO concentrated with the pepper.  Painful.  Gross.  Stupid.  I really can't say it made a huge difference.

There was also a recipe for a SOUP with cayenne pepper, and this one you drank so the pepper would burn your throat and kill the little germs all the way down.  Why on earth would I ever think THAT was a good idea?  Like I said, I was desperate for relief.  It called for a can of tomato soup, can of water, teaspoon of cayenne pepper, garlic (I used garlic powder since that's all we had), and a splash of lemon, but I didn't have that either.  So basically a super spicy tomato soup.  I took a sip of just the regular tomato soup pre-pepper, and that, alone, burned so intensely.  At this point, after 3 days of hurting, it was so painful to swallow, I couldn't talk, and could barely drink enough water to get down Ibuprofen.  So regardless of the flavor of the soup, swallowing was just difficult.  

I filled up a mug of the death soup and took it in to the bathroom, fully prepared to throw-up if it came to that.  I took one big swallow and realized I'd forgotten to coat my lips with Vaseline. BURNING!  ALREADY BURNING!  So I lathered up my lips in an exaggerated way, and drank the soup as fast as I could.  Big gulps and only stopping to breathe a few times in between.  When it came down to the last gulp, my eyes were burning, I was coughing, and my lips were completely burning.  I started half-whimpering, half-crying, and felt completely helpless as to how to minimize the pain.  I couldn't drink milk because that would defeat the purpose of drinking the soup.  So I shut down.  I crawled into my bed, curled up in a little ball, and tried to welcome sleep quickly so I could escape my personal burning Hell.  Luckily I did end up taking a little nap, and the burning was gone when I woke up.  But the stupid SORE THROAT was still there!  Argh!!!  After so much pain and nastiness.  Nothing!  What about that 1-2 hour relief plan?!  So mad. So frustrated.  

I've included a collection of pictures of ALL the things I've tried in the past 4 days.  It all started with a dry, sharp, killer sore throat.  Add in an on-going cough, mucus, fever, body aches, and nausea.  It's been an eventful weekend of experiments:

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(Priesthood Blessing)

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(This is Cassity's humidifier-- haha)

Today I woke up with a fever, completely soaked in sweat.  Although the swallowing issue has somewhat improved, the fever has remained throughout the day and my body aches.  I still cough big, deep coughs that burn my throat and rarely produce any kind of progress.  I didn't really talk for the past 2 days-- my throat was too dry and it hurt-- but now I can kind of talk in short snippets.  I look like death and feel like it too. :)

I've never been so sick before.  Granted, my body has a weak immune system and I have a hard time fighting off even a basic cold, but this has really rocked me.  According to the doctor on Thursday, I didn't have Strep Throat.  I'm considering going to the doctor again on Monday to see if I've developed anything else, because this seems more than just a virus.  Maybe it will be a waste of $30 again, but it won't hurt to try, right?

Cassity has been one heck of a roommate and it will be a miracle if she doesn't get sick, with all my germs hovering in the apartment.  Crossing my fingers that she won't... and praying that I will get better soon!